Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize