she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
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