Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
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