She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
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