I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
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