I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
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