At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
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