i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Randomize
