and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize
