It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
Ladies don't puke and tell
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
