I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
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