tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
accomplished twins. life is a go
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize