You were right, I'm so drunk and I want to eat the shit out of my vanilla cupcake candle it smells delish
Experience is the best teacher
I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
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