So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
