Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
Randomize
