This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
Randomize
