You can't special order awesome
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Randomize
