i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
