my vag is so smooth its legendary
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
Randomize
