I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
Randomize
