I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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