What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
Randomize
