Just mADE A PArabola og urine
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
Barsexuality is the new black.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
Randomize
