the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
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