i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
