Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
Randomize
