Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Randomize
