Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
