how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
