I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
It's official drugs can't kill me
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
Randomize
