what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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