Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
Randomize