never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
We are all done wearing pants today
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
Randomize
