i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
Randomize
