remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
Randomize
