should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
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