I'll bet she douches with gravy.
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Randomize
