I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
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