hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Randomize
