but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
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