i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
Randomize
