I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
Randomize
