Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
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