dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
