Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
You came home screaming the lyrics to Drunk in love, and dumped wine on me when I said you would never be Beyoncé
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
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