theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
Randomize
