Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize
