Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
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