Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
Randomize