need another drink. this is the easiest way
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
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