I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
i am craving dick and cupcakes
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
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