Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
Randomize
