We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize