Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
